It’s all fun and games, until you get caught

I’ll admit that, like any superpower, procrastination has its limits. Speeding through a task fueled only by a rush of adrenaline is a skill only a select few should undertake. It’s not for the faint of heart, or for the logical of heart. People like my long -suffering husband, a model of logical thinking. Spock pales in comparison. Yet somehow we’ve survived last-minute packing, late bill fees, and speed-demon clean-ups on Easter morning. Is the idea of getting caught part of the thrill?

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Why “Late Mommy?”

Kids say the darndest things…we’ve addressed my punctuality problem but have I mentioned the frequent bouts of absent-mindedness? One episode involved my cute-as-a-button 4-year-old and it also happened to be her very first week of school. Ever. As she waited expectantly for her mommy to arrive at dismissal time I sat at the desk of my part-time job lost in my own universe, unaware that her wide little eyes were scanning the parking lot for mommy to arrive and take her home, away from her toe-tapping teacher and vacant classroom. The instant my phone rang I snapped back to reality. My heart sank when I realized my mistake. I squealed into the parking lot and the moment I reached the front office was the moment I was christened “late mommy!” by my then wild-eyed daughter. Not my finest hour and not forgotten to this day. Silver lining: a kick-ass blog name.

So you’re always late? Everywhere?

Procrastination has a funny way of oozing into the rest of your business. Take punctuality, it’s easy to find an excuse to be late for nearly every occasion when you let procrastination take over. It gives you false peace of mind, telling you not to rush, you still have five minutes, you’ll get there when you get there. Which oddly enough is consistently ten minutes late, no matter where I happen to be going or how far I’m traveling. Ten minutes beyond the acceptable point of arrival every.single.time. My subconscious is working overtime to make me look like a total moron. Self-destruct much? A professional opinion may need to be called in to unpack all of this, (arms circling around in a wild flourish indicating┬áthe general chaos is the background.)